Report of 26 Jan 2020

2020 sounds cool.  Like hindsight.

It is India's Republic Day today.  The 71st one.  The Constitution was adopted on 26 January 1950 and we became a republic.  Hooray!

We are well.  I was at Kovalam this week and the bereaved gentleman came for a checkup.  I asked - as I ask of most of my patients - if he had eaten that morning and he had: rice.  I asked where, and he said, "Home."  I was delighted: he had not previously wanted to eat at home, in his grief - the food tasted different, it was not his wife's cooking, he preferred to eat at a hotel, etc.  His eating at home is a good sign to me that he is coming to terms with his wife's absence.  He seemed pleased that I was pleased. 

A lady came, stating that she was wary I would reprimand her for being noncompliant with her meds.  She said her grandson had died, and she had not kept up with her medication regimen, with the demise and the rituals surrounding it.  I was stricken.  It is a tragedy to outlive one's child and to outlive one's grandchild - I can only imagine the enormity of the sadness.  As I held her face in my hands and consoled her, then directing her to get her blood pressure checked at the next desk where our capable assistant, Keerthana, sits, the student intern in the room said, "How did he die?"  As though it mattered.  I imagine I was this pesky as a student, also.  Then the student - who does not speak Tamil - asked how the patient was; I said, "Grieving," and that was that. 

I don't know the fine art of keeping quiet, either, so I cannot urge it of anyone else, can I.

Adaikalam was good.  One of our patients has joined the staff as a health care worker and we are happy.  She is a very perceptive lady and jumps to attend to patients' needs.  She also gives good massages and I have been a happy recipient of this therapeutic service.  It is truly spectacular when a patient's mental illness comes under control, the underlying self-confidence becomes resurgent and the patient proceeds to use her/his skills, earning a nice living and getting more self-confident in this entire process.  We've heard of vicious cycles; this one is a benevolent, happy cycle. 

Scott and I attended a festival celebration of our rural heritage, saw artworks at the open house of a local artists' village, and saw the movie "1917."  I couldn't quite appreciate the finesse of 1 continuous shot, but enjoyed the movie and was saddened by many parts of it.  I did enjoy the fine cameos of well-known stars - especially Mark Strong, a favorite - in the flick. 

At our Pongal celebrations and at the village celebration, there was a performance called Parai Aattam.  Parai is a type of drum.  As the drummers played, the music spoke to my DNA and all my blood vessels; I did dance at the Pongal event when they called for audience participation and am unfailingly surprised that Scott can stay without moving a muscle when thumping, rhythmic, joyous music is played. 

We got to hang out with our sons this week and it was nice, though Naren was tired.  It was nice to talk and laugh and get updated on happenings in their lives.  I spoke to my Dad today and there were a couple of chuckles, which I appreciated. 

Today is the 21st anniversary of my handsome brother Manu's demise.  It is the first time in many years that I am not in Madurai, going to the cemetery with my father.  I miss Manu's presence and geniality and easy laughter, even his hideous turquoise blue tank top.  I am grateful his family stays in our lives. 

Enjoy your own family.

Unw -

R  

Report of 19 January 2020

I wonder if one-sided shoulder stiffness can be polymyalgia rheumatica.  No history of accidents, lifting heavy weights, unusually strenuous workouts.  The right shoulder has been hurting all week, starting at a talk on Monday when I could not reach across the table for a bottle of water. 

Also, how does one get mold off swim goggles?  I have tried vinegar, Dawn, a local herbal hairwash product, and scrubbing with toothpaste.  Nada. 

We are well and hope the same with you.  Scott and I went to a talk on mental health in indigenous communities; it was organised by the Banyan and I learnt something.  It was a late night, and I had to make an effort to get to my workout the next day.  It was a well-attended talk, as Banyan talks are. 

I went to Adaikalam one day this week.  A few days ago, we got some splendid news.  The son of one of my former colleagues has been selected for a job in the Middle East.  He was careful and vetted the jobs carefully, ensuring that he did not go through an employment agent.  We have watched this young man get educated and then get his first job and now he is overseas, earning well!  We are as pleased as punch, as the family's economic status is now better, and the young man is at a job that he is well-trained for.  "Pull 1 person out of poverty."   

Yet another colleague, a health care workers, is studying by correspondence (distance learning).  She will finish her degree in psychology in a couple of years, we hope, and will likely become a counsellor; I can't wait.  She is a single parent, and is a shining example to her daughter of how not to wilt when a spouse abandons you. 

Pongal, our harvest festival, was this week.  Scott and I had a few days off and enjoyed being home.  I was a bit sick for 2 of the 3 days and am rabidly diagnosing myself.  What of this right shoulder pain, I wonder. 

We had pongal, the sweet dish made of rice and jaggery and ghee, made by the vocational training unit of the Banyan.  The lady who helps us around our house also made it using millets, a hardy and healthy grain.  So we had all manner of sweet treats to celebrate this important festival.  We were at Writer's Cafe yesterday - our favorite place to eat.  We caught up with familiar personnel there, and had a good meal.  After that, we went to a concert by "Violin Nomads," which was excellent.  Nice music from around the world, which is unfailingly lovely.  We saw my brother and his daughter at the venue, which also hosts classes in French (my niece attends); that was good fun.   

We spoke separately to both boys, who were busy.  I remain perennially grateful that they still find time for us.

Unw -

R

Report of 12 January 2020

Good afternoon!

Weeks that I cannot write are incomplete, for me - pressing.  We were out of town last weekend and I expected to have time daily to write, and that was not to be.  Life was busy.

After New Year's Day, I deferred my private practice patients and Scott and I drove to Tiruchi on 2 Jan.  College had not started for him yet, and I was happy to have his company.  A patient of the Banyan has moved back to her village near Tiruchi, and is taking care of several other mentally ill ladies, too, running the Tiruchi branch of the Banyan.  Numerous medical issues were pending and I had thought we might go at the end of the month, but I capitalised on Scott's availability and we took off.  We reached at lunchtime, partook of the sumptuous fare that the ladies there routinely make and then saw almost all the patients.  It was exhausting but good.  Then Scott and I walked around the village, loving the verdant surroundings and the rice fields and the evening life unique to a village.  It was nice.  We slept in the office room of the Tiruchi project, and then the next morning, I took a long walk.  I walked around the fields, and spoke to a farmer or 2, roamed around the village, walking to the other side and beyond.  Breakfast - Scott's favorite, poori - was then served, Scott and I ate, and then finished seeing the rest of the patients.  The project lead, Ms. X, had a huge bag of sweets for me as a gift, along with a nice basket woven by one of the women; I tried very hard to share the sweets, but no one would hear of it, so I packed them. 

Scott computerised my findings and recommendations, which was helpful.  No bigger nightmare than trying to decipher a physician's handwriting, especially since it involves life-altering actions. 

We headed on to Madurai and arrived to find my father very ill; his caregiver signalled discreetly to me and gave me the update.  He had had trouble breathing for a couple of days, and had started the treatment his pulmonologist had once recommended.  We did not pause to use the facilities, but headed on to the pharmacy, bought some meds and returned.  I started treatment, advocated gargling and did chest percussion therapy, which loosened up quite a bit of my Dad's chest congestion.  After this, we rested for a bit and then resumed treatment in the evening.  The caregiver is a fine person, "worth her weight in gold" - Scott Weiss.  We had an early night, convinced that my father was on the mend.

The next morning, my father seemed much better.  The caregiver said he had slept well, unlike the prior couple of nights.  We had a long discussion on many matters, then had a nice lunch.  Scott and I then got ready, and left for the wedding of Jessica and Jarryd; Jarryd is the second son of my long-time friend, Tanya.  We are now at the age where we attend weddings ad infinitum, and this one was fun.  There were many people there whom I knew, and catching up with them was lovely.  A band from our childhood days also played and I danced with many of the women there.  It was a memorable evening.

The next day, we returned to Chennai and I went to the clinic in Kovalam on Monday.  That was nice.  I took the bag of sweets that Ms. X had sent from Tiruchi and we doled out 1 each to the clinic patients.  It is quite amazing what 1 little toffee can do.  There were lots of smiles and appreciation.  One of our older patients, a retired fisherman, came with a skin complaint.  I am not a dermatologist, but prescribed treatment as best as I could.  He then bent to touch my feet, a sign of great respect - one that younger folks give elders, or students give teachers, etc.  I am uncomfortable with it when offered by patients, and tried to thwart the gesture.  The clinic is a joy; many of the patients only need to come once in six months to have their blood pressure, etc., monitored, but many come every clinic day.  There is a lot of mutual respect, and chatter, and laughter, and what I hope is good care.  All this means a lot to an impoverished patient, just as it means much to us to try to provide it. 

Private practice is nice.  Swaram Hospital owners are good, ethical and respectful folks.  I see a vast variety of cases there and my quest to curb obesity is slowly starting.  After hearing the statistic that 70% of the U.S. population is overweight or obese, I sure would like to treat it here: there is not a single organ system that obesity spares in causing damage. 

Scott and I saw a movie named "Kalidas" and ate out.  We also went to a couple of markets offering fare directly from the makers.  Those are nice.  We talked to our sons last week and appreciated their time and chatter: as always, candid, fun, intelligent, articulate ("Tactile," they said about a museum exhibit, when I would have said "Touchy," proving why they creamed us in Scrabble) and very funny.  Blessings.

We hope you have many blessings of your own. 

Unw -

R

Report of 1 Jan 2020

Happy New Year, dear folks!

We hope that the year brings you good health, happiness and whatever you are working for.

I have just eaten a bowl of cold pomagranate.  Cold is usually good.  The lady who helps clean our house and cooks for us anticipates well: if pomagranates are sitting around, she shells them.  What a treat!  To not have to do the work and have cold fruit at the ready.  This lot, though, I think we shelled.  It is quite a treat to do it: the seeds are nestled in nooks and crannies, and it feels like hitting the mother lode when one stumbles across a hitherto-unpeeled section, and finds the seeds hidden. 

Last week was magical, and passed like a dream.  Both Naren and Navin were here, and my sister hosted Christmas in Vellore.  All of us were in 1 spot, plenty of pictures were taken and our presents were appreciated.  We ate non-stop.  We left Vellore on Christmas evening, and returned to Chennai to have breakfast early the next morning with Navin's friend, Srivi, and her boyfriend, Thomas.  That was simply spectacular: to sit and eat and listen to extremely intelligent young folks talk.  Navin visited a few friends that evening, Naren preferring to hang out at home, and both boys stayed home on the 27th.  We ate, played a board game - Rummikub - and talked about their lives.  It was nice.  The boys did not live in this house before they moved to the U.S. and stated once that this did not feel like home, which is understandable.  I think some familiarity is setting in, helped largely by the balcony I am sitting on.  The sight of abundant greenery and the blue sea is a treat.

The boys left on 27th night and we then attended a wedding in Chennai, preparing to attend another one this week in Madurai.   

I did not work at all last week, happily taking the week off.  I did return to Swaram on Saturday and saw some patients.  That evening was the wedding of my friend Rosammal's son.  Scott and I went, and I reunited with some Lady Doak College classmates after almost 40 years.  Needless to say, that was grand fun and all of us enjoyed ourselves.  On Sunday, I swam and on Monday, returned to the Banyan.  Clinic was very well-run and good. 

The patient who lost his wife last year came for a checkup.  He mentioned that he had been eating at restaurants, as his daughter-in-law's cooking was not quite the same as his wife's.  He said this with an air of deprivation and grief, and I was sorry.  I requested him not to eat out due to the vast potential of food-borne illness, and then thought to myself that I should not say that, I should understand his grief and coax him to eat healthy, whether at a restaurant or at home.  So I said that, and we had a cordial visit.  Another patient came by: her late husband used to be a dancer, and I have often requested her to dance in the exam room, to which she practically rolls over laughing.  We had a student from the Banyan Academy of Leadership in Mental Health (BALM) visiting, and I had to ham it up a little: after the patient's checkup, I stood up, twirled her around and I danced, while she desisted.  The Banyan is great about providing variety in our day. 

Our young assistant, Keerthana, was also sick after the B's Christmas meal and the powers that be are at work trying to improve hygiene in food serving and prep.  This is the joy of the B: I usually say things once. 

My sister and brother-in-law were in town, and we met at my favorite restaurant, Writer's Cafe.  We had a splendid visit, with lots of chatter and laughter.  They had done some shopping prior to our meeting, and then left for Vellore. 

On the 31st, my friend, Joan, and her husband, Mohanraj, invited us to lunch with their sons, Kevin and Niranjan.  It was a stupendous way to end the year.  Kevin and Niranjan are tall, stunningly handsome, personable, intelligent and fun, and we spent a lot of time talking and laughing, and listening to their considered viewpoints.  Joan and Mohanraj are friends whom we consider soulmates.  It was a very lovely time, and Joan packed some leftovers for us, which we tucked into today.

This morning, I did my usual weights routine - God bless my Fort Wayne personal trainer, Zach - and swam for quite a while, which was a splendid way to start the day.  I talked to my Dad and that was lovely.  He seemed surprised at my wishes, then stated he was not, that he was aware that it was New Year's Day.  We will see him later this week - Insha Allah - and will attend a wedding. 

It is a good life, thanks, God.  Nice profession, fun husband, opinionated and affectionate children.  Engaging extended family.  Fine, fine friends.  Many blessings. 

We hope you have countless blessings of your own this year and next and next.

Unw -

R