Report of 21 Jan 2024

 Good evening!

This is how married couples stay different and still together, eh.  Scott is sitting under a full-blowing ceiling fan and I am sitting with no fan and bedspread on around my shoulders as I am cold.  Scott loves winters in the homeland - he is currently in shorts and a short-sleeved shirt, and the balcony doors plus back doors are open to allow a breeze.  

We are okay.  I am sick of being sick.  This virus left and apparently is back.  Our Tylenol (paracetamol) bottle has done overtime, such a wonder drug.  I have also drunk coconut water and all of it has helped.  This week, my workout called me in the mornings; last week, it did not.  

Early this week, we attended a dance performance by a Singapore-based dance troupe and it was good.  We left before it ended as we live well outside the city and driving at night is neither person's forte.  It was lovely to get some culture in, though.  

Vaishnavi, 1 of the 2 founders of the Banyan, is helping a disabled friend's apartment security man get the care he needs.  He fell off his motorcycle and broke his shoulder.  Care at our Government hospitals is free; it is easier if the patient knows someone there.  My parents worked in the Government system and all our care was there - go, escorted by my Dad or someone else, get quick care and leave.  Not a luxury open to all, as the system is overloaded.  Thankfully, a plastic surgeon friend is helping to get this patient treated.  The patient appears to be a very good guy, from far-off Nepal, and getting the disabled couple assistance whenever needed, including during floods.  It's a shame we use the plural for that last word.  Chennai routinely floods during rains.  

We visited a couple of friends yesterday and attended an art exhibition organised in memory of our friend, John.  John died a year ago.  His wife (tough to say "widow"), Karin, came from Germany as they usually did in December, and organised this show.  It was therapeutic to grieve together and to see magnificent art contributed by John's friends and himself.  There was also a video show playing; it was surreal to see John on it.  

Our kids are busy and that is a great problem/situation to have, as we say in our house.  

Unw -

R

Report of 14 Jan 2024

 Good morning and happy Pongal!

Pongal is the harvest festival in Tamil Nadu, called by various names nationwide.  Very important for all, especially farmers.  We celebrate by doing a puja (worship) to the Gods, make rice sweetened with jaggery and eat sugarcane.  We have bought the sugarcane and the flowers, and esposo is sound asleep, so we will do the puja when he awakens.  

I am in a perennial bad mood these days.  There are things about the wedding that could have been better.  Scott states everyone remembers it as a happy time, so that's what counts.  It was all new territory for me, I guess, and I was learning as I went.  The important thing is that my Dad came a great distance - he does not normally leave the house - and did not fall ill.  He also said he enjoyed himself immensely and was happy to have been invited.  We have a video of Nat and James touching his feet and seeking blessings, and that is priceless.  

We are also glad James's parents came.  They learnt new things and were immensely helpful at Christmas.  We had to drop various people off at bus stations and such on Christmas night, and returned to find food put away and dishes cleaned.  That was a relief.  

We were at a non-profit called Wild Ideas about 10 days ago and spent 2 days there.  It was good to work with the rural women.  They are economically better, appear to be happy at this endeavor and listened quite intently to my advice.  We had to cut our trip short as our guest room was needed for the next guest.  We left, visited the Ramana Maharishi ashram and the Tiruvannamalai temple.  On the way back, we saw Ginjee (Senjee) fort and it called us to climb it.  So off we went.  Thankfully, my workout shoes were in my bag, so I changed into those and we climbed the 400 steps up the hill.  Senjee is called the "Troy of the East," and it was truly awe-inspiring to see rich history in our own land.  

It is now back to work with telemedicine and giving talks.  It helps me to write.  The bad mood is dissipating.  

I talked to my Dad yesterday - our usual Sunday talk - and that was nice.  I told him of our week.  

We visited Vaishnavi's mother yesterday.  V is one of the 2 founders of the Banyan, and now does yeoman service in the arena of disability rights.  It truly is an arena: she files Public Interest Litigations, and the Government contests.  She does not give up and has been an inspiration to all of us.  Anything our state has achieved in the disability rights arena is largely thanks to Vaish.  She is also a fan of Nat and was at her wedding, which we are grateful for.  Vaish's Mom is articulate, erudite and jolly good fun.  We had a fabulous visit, though we reached a bit late thanks to some confusion with Google maps.  

We also went to the Chennai book fair and that was lovely.  So many people interested in printed matter.  We bought a few books and enjoyed our time there.  

Unw -

R

And an addendum

 Lessons learnt so far:

1. Be kind to trans people and all members of the rainbow community.

2. Everyone likes to eat well.

3. Biryani is a fine food to serve guests at weddings.

4. Everyone likes to be treated as though they matter.

5. Ice cream toppings set the tone for long after, too.  

6. Be good to guests at weddings and feed them well. 

7. Young people and their flexibility are excellent resources.

8. The choice to marry is that, a choice.  

9. Let (mostly) good words come out of my mouth.

10. I will never have a monstrous house with huge rooms.  Scott and I will always have room for those who wish to come.  

Report of 3 Jan 2024

 Happy New Year!

I am a mother-in-law.  Nat, our daughter, got married last month at a ceremony at the Banyan.  James and she co-own a farm with 2 others, and do engineering jobs during the day plus farm work at off times.  My father made it for the wedding, along with a fleet of caregivers; we were very glad of that and that he did not fall ill.  James's mother, Tina, and stepfather, Jeff, travelled to India for the wedding and all appreciated meeting them. 

2 months were spent organising wedding stuffola.  Nat and James left on the 1st late night/2nd early morning.  Naren and Rebecca are sitting in front of us, doing work on the computer, and will leave later today.  

Tomorrow, Scott and I will go work with a remarkable nonprofit called Wild Ideas.  I had been asking them for some time for the opportunity, and it has come through.  They suggested I go in December; it was a bit hectic then, so we requested a Jan date.  That was mutually decided, and off we go tomorrow.  I look forward to working with a group of strong women.  

One of my colleagues and friends, Mr. X, had a massive heart attack earlier last year.  We tried to set up some followup for him, and that was accomplished; the procedure to look at the blood vessels surrounding his heart (a "cath" or an "angiogram") was not done and I definitely needed that done for him.  So we contacted some nice docs who take care of impoverished and ill people, and they saw my friend.  He had a severe blockage, so a bypass surgery was done, to my great relief.  Some of Mr. X's family members came to the wedding; he was still in the hospital then.  I am glad Mr. X is on the mend.

Among other guests at the wedding, 3 college friends were present and I was very happy.  So was a childhood friend, Farshid.  Everyone should have a Farsh at wedding-time; Farsh loved and chatted and laughed, and helped me cook and clean for the Christmas Eve and Christmas Day gatherings.  After that dose of Farsh, all was right with the world.  It was lovely.  I understand weddings can be stressful.  Farsh made it less so.  

Happy and healthy New Year to all of you!

Unw -

R