Report of 31 Dec '07

Hello from the B -

Wow, the last day of the year! And it seemed like it'd only just begun.

We are well. Our friend from Indy, Scott Semester, is here. He's an easygoing guest, the best kind - willing to roll w/ the traffic, the poor hygiene, the crowds, stares, all else. He brought a ton of chocolate, cookies and movies, along with special treats for the boys, endearing him forever to the entire Weiss family (also endearing his mother, who provided many of the edible treats). He will give a talk on fundraising today at the B, as he works in fundraising at a church in Indy, and as all of us from the B are to be out with begging bowls. Scott will probably tell us of effective alternatives to the bowls.

Our patients are well. Christmas celebrations were had, and I could attend none of them as Naren was ill. My sister, Anu, used to feel awful to leave her sick children behind as she headed off to the wards to take care of others' sick children, and we have since decided that little was worth doing that. So I spent time with Naren, he got better and we drove to Madurai with my nephew, Sudhir. Christmas was spent with my parents, and that was nice. My mother is disabled with a non-functional left knee and has taken to spending more time in bed as it hurts her to walk and sit; we have attempted to correct that situation, but much hinges on the patient's willingness. Cousins have railed at us - "You are a family of doctors and you can't take care of your own mother?" - but you know, it is up to the patient to decide how much of the doctors' advice to follow. The whole family enjoyed Scott's gentle, witty presence, and thrived on it; it was nice to see how welcome my husband is over there, with the entire in-law brigade.

The Weisses, and my sister-in-law and niece, Susan and Sanjana, went to the cemetery in Madurai. Susan's parents are buried next to my brother, and we paid our respects at all 3 graves. It is somewhat soothing to be in the cemetery, almost as though we can speak to Manu from there, and we lingered a bit. Susan and I got red noses at the end of it, and she and Sanjana put a garland of roses on Manu's grave, and we reminisced. It is still difficult to accept that Manu is not with us.

We returned to Chennai, and then Navin fell sick. He vomited several times during the night after our return, and woke us up once. Then he took care of matters by himself the next couple of episodes, and I heard him again. He proceeded to run a fever, and I took time off from work to make sure this son got better also.

We spent Saturday exploring Chennai with Scott Semester, and drove to Vellore to spend the night with my sister and brother-in-law. Anu and Benji are great fun to be around, and the next day, we went to a resort nearby called Yelagiri, revelled in the scenic grandeur, and came home. We are at the B today, ready to tackle work.

At this point, I'd like to wish all of you a wonderful 2008. May good health, love and laughter surround you, and may you never know loneliness and hunger.

With my salaams,

Renu Bose Weiss

Report of 17 Dec '07

Hello from the B -

Naren is very sick today. Fever, asthma attack and general malaise. Nothing can turn the world upside down like one's child being ill, and all my thoughts are with the boy. He is to go on a class trip today to look at how villages in North India are empowering themselves, and is likely to not go.

The B is ok, and we are using a new occupational/physical therapist we hired to improve gait in some of the women. Regretfully, one of them, Ms. V, fell and sustained big injuries on the face. I am seriously suspecting a fracture and ordered some xrays, but Ms. V apparently would not cooperate with the x-ray taking and yelled obscenities at all concerned. We are going to have to use our best judgement here. Ms. V is normally a cheerful sort, a huge fan of filmi music, and has a tremendous sense of rhythm - bopping along to the songs with great glee - and we hope her current illness will not get the better of this joie de vivre.

Tutoring did happen, and Navin and a friend tutored. We will have a small Xmas party for the chilluns this Friday and wrap up for a couple of weeks. Last year, when one of them seemed mighty excited about Xmas, I asked how she celebrated it; she said they set out a nativity scene and go to church. I asked if they made goodies to eat, and immediately kicked myself: our tutoring populace cannot afford a whole lot at all. So no goodies to eat, no new clothes and no gifts - but she was so excited about the festival. True meaning of Xmas, then, isn't it.

We had Navin's class over for a party last week, as I don't know many of the kids there. A few boys and nearly all the girls showed up. Navin states he and some friends mainly hang around with the girls, playing basketball, chatting, etc., and he and Skanda are the only boys who steadfastly attend the girls' parties; I asked if he didn't feel awkward at the last part and he stated absolutely not, there was more pizza/cake for him and Skanda since the other boys were not present. Pragmatism for you. Anyway, we had a whale of a time, the kids were scrupulously polite and it was a treat to have girls in the house. Several of them thanked us long after they left, for a wonderful time. It was sweet.

Y'day was a potluck with some neighbors and that was also great fun. It is simply spectacular to be surrounded by good people.

We leave for Madurai at the end of this week to celebrate Xmas with my parents. Various sibs and sibs-in-law will trickle in later, and it will be a time to eat, laugh, talk, eat some more.

May you have a very merry Christmas and a happy, healthy 2008!

Unw -

R

Report of 12 Dec '07

Hello from Chennai!

It's 13 shopping days or whatever until Christmas. Both Scott and I appreciate living in a country where the commercialism of Christmas has not obliterated its true meaning. We attended a Carol Service on Sunday, and it was wonderful to listen to the music of the season - always a favorite of mine.

I am envious of people who find solace in places of worship. Since Manu's demise, I simply look around at the architecture, and the people.

The B is fine. We have tried very hard to maintain cleanliness, and prevent illness. I can't tell yet if it's working, but I am pleased with the results, and with the health care workers, social workers and my patients. One of the patients in the sick room had been perseverating on depositing 2 checks, and all of us had dismissed this as an undeniable manifestation of her mental illness. As it turned out, she did indeed have 2 checks to be deposited - the joke was on us. (Her ex-husband sends her Rs. 950 a month, which is lovely, esp compared to how some of our other patients are treated by their families.) So she went to the bank, returned with a vat of money, and has been buying treats. She had some mixture (sort of like trail-mix) and was eating it when I walked in yesterday. She stopped immediately and shared it with me, causing all sorts of thrills in my heart. My patient populace has very little, and is not in the least bashful about sharing any - or all - of it with me.

Tutoring is fine, and a couple of kids have asked to be tutors. This is nice for us, as we can use all the help we can get. 2 students came last week, the rest were ill; when the weather changes, the impoverished have absolutely no resources like blankets to cope with it and illness is rife now. We've given away the umbrellas that Doug Watts brought, and don't find any of them in use - probably hidden away by the mothers in case of breakage due to excessive use.

The B is staggeringly short of funds. My raise didn't go into effect (this is not a huge deal) and all kinds of necessary expenses have not been met. Navin (my 14 yo son) is running part of the Chennai Marathon to raise funds for the B, and Naren (16 yo) is mulling it over. Pls email me if you want to pledge any amount for Navin's run.

The 3 Weiss men and I caught a couple of Tamil movies and enjoyed them. We also met my visiting aunt for dinner, and it was wonderful to have some great family time together.

Unw -

R

Report of 5 Dec '07

Hello from the B -

It is rather gloomy here as one of our senior trustees, Mrs. Vellodi, has passed away. She and her husband have been steadfast in their support of Vandana and Vaishnavi's grand venture, and it is indeed wonderful to have older folks share their wisdom and experience with young ones in any venture. The airconditioner in the Vellodis' bedroom had caught fire and they had escaped with their lives, but were hospitalised for smoke inhalation. They were then shifted to Vandana and Vaishnavi's house, and were doing well, then both were re-admitted. Mrs. Vellodi contracted pneumonia and a variety of other illnesses, and died early this morning. There were tough decisions to be made on her care, with the lone surviving child in the U.K. and wanting to wait for his father to recover consciousness before taking said decision.

Vaishnavi had fallen ill 2 days ago, and when I checked on her, she stated that it was likely stress. We discussed the Vellodis and I mentioned she was probably very affected as she is close to them, and I am not as much. However, the passing has put heaviness on my heart also.

The B has a partner NGO (Non-government organisation) named Sahayam, which houses male patients. We suppport them as we can. Last week, our team picked up a male patient, took him to Sahayam and he returned the following day. He seemed agitated and violent, and our astute stores-supervisor, Balan, offered him a beedi (a native cigarette) and a cup of tea, and he calmed down. When one of the male staff patted him on the shoulder, he winced. They took off his shirt to see, and the poor man had been beaten so badly that there was discoloration on the left upper arm and on his back. The staff was distraught, and I went to check on the patient. He had indeed been thrashed, and I was concerned about a bone being broken (our female patients have very brittle bones - "osteoporotic" - and who knows about the men), so sent him for further eval to the hospital. He returned with a verdict of no fractures, but the incident was alarming - especially because the B has a firm policy of not beating patients and there's our partner NGO beating them. The social worker in charge of patient rescue ("Helpline" - which all citizens can call if they spot a person on the street who appears mentally ill) has set up a meeting with the director of Sahayam, and we hope for the best.

Tutoring is going on, with lots of giggles as the kids attempt to do math. I was alone last week as both our sons had other commitments: Naren has "special class," an extra class which runs late and Navin had to be tutored himself as he has mightily tanked the last set of exams. It was a challenge to individually tutor the kids, and I reiterate my thought that teachers ought to get their salaries doubled annually.

With yet another tantrum from Naren recently, and Navin's abysmal grades, I lost it last week. I mentioned how phenomenal the B's patients are, having survived beatings, rape, scrounging in the street sand for food and being "discarded" by their own families, and how they manage to find the time for a smile and a kind word for me. My sons, sitting w/ their own family, a roof over their heads and food that they *like* to eat in front of them, not being thrashed or verbally harassed in any way, were being thunderously disrespectful and I'd had it. (One day, when Navin had a stomach upset, Scott asked if there was yogurt in the fridge and all 3 waited for my answer, as though I were either the fridge, or the only person who could get up and look. I have now taken to not replying such questions, period.) I ended up in tears, inadvertently. The treatment at home has since improved.

Take good care of yourselves with, at the very least, a 30-minute walk per day.

Unw -

R