Report of 3 Apr '05
This has been a tumultous week already - and it's Monday. I got an email from a friend from residency days and she mentioned that her ex-husband had committed suicide. I love this friend dearly, and was also fond of the young man, so was considerably sorry to get the news. As we decided, life is very short and we must enjoy every moment that we can. I was originally going to work in the U.S. for a year after residency and make some $, but after my brother Manu died, all those plans went flying out the window and we hastened here.
My 15 yo nephew, Manu's son, is going through some difficult times. Anyone w/ any input into teen grief, pls enlighten me. This boy has been put in charge of taking care of his 6 yo sister when his mother works long hours and executes this responsibility half-heartedly, esp as the sister is clearly the preferred child in the family. I can't blame him one whit, really, and all his actions are a manifestation of things dished out to him, I feel. His mother, furious, wanted us to talk to him; I thought it a better option to listen to him, and a whole host of complaints came flying from his side - such as he can never go to a sleepver or a movie w/ his friends b'cos he must take care of his younger sister. I have suggested to my s-i-l that she employ a maid and requested Scott to take the nephew out for a movie and a meal this past weekend - I consider Scott's presence gentle, comforting and sweet (much like a warm cookie, I guess) and felt this would be good for my nephew. Scott and I emailed this am, after said outing, and we decided we'd just ensure that my nephew knew he had people who cared about him. The 2 men had a great time, Scott said.
I feel wrung out. The Banyan is good. A young woman from there has been chosen as nanny to a famous Mumbai actress's child, and has left for the big city. She is extremely attractive and, after her husband sent her home 3 months after they got married (the marriage was essentially over), she felt that she was burdening her parents and got on a train and came to Chennai. She stated that she was raped by policemen en route. She had a couple of medical problems, which I treated, and stated to her that she could call us any time she needed for medical or other help. As much as folks envied her for being Star Actress's nanny, my priority was to ensure her safety and continued health. I noticed that the founders have a written plan of action for this young woman's resettling, and was impressed.
The boys and I spent last weekend in Madurai w/ my parents, today being my father's b'day, and my sister, Anu, and her younger son were there as well. (Scott could not get tix on the only train to Mdu from B'lore.) The entire time was spent eating and laughing - Anu stated that my parents' house was the only place where she could gain 2 lbs in 1 day. There is a big plastic surgery meeting in Mdu today and some apparent bigwigs were at my parents' house last night - they spoke solely of their own achievements and bored all of us to near tears. I can see no reason for this course of action (self-aggrandizement) and can only speculate that as folks age, they want to hold onto past glory. Anu states it has nothing to do w/ age, and I must agree: there are pompous folks of all ages.
The tutoring concluded last week as the school year is ending. The last day was 1 April and we stated to all, teachers and students, that we'd have a practice exam for them. Most received this news w/ trepidation until the April Fool's trick was revealed to them. We passed out paint boxes, pencils and candy, all of which many of you donated, and the kids were pleased w/ these goodies. We got some feedback from the kids about what they'd want emphasised in tutoring next year, and will implement these suggestions.
I am going to wind up. We leave for the U.S. next week and I look forward to seeing many of you again. Also, the chance to brush up on Western medicine is priceless. I visited a friend's mother, herself a wonderful friend, in Mdu and told her that tho' I am faithless, I think there is a God when I look at my husband and my American degree.
"Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre but they are more deadly in the long run." - Mark Twain
Until next week,
My 15 yo nephew, Manu's son, is going through some difficult times. Anyone w/ any input into teen grief, pls enlighten me. This boy has been put in charge of taking care of his 6 yo sister when his mother works long hours and executes this responsibility half-heartedly, esp as the sister is clearly the preferred child in the family. I can't blame him one whit, really, and all his actions are a manifestation of things dished out to him, I feel. His mother, furious, wanted us to talk to him; I thought it a better option to listen to him, and a whole host of complaints came flying from his side - such as he can never go to a sleepver or a movie w/ his friends b'cos he must take care of his younger sister. I have suggested to my s-i-l that she employ a maid and requested Scott to take the nephew out for a movie and a meal this past weekend - I consider Scott's presence gentle, comforting and sweet (much like a warm cookie, I guess) and felt this would be good for my nephew. Scott and I emailed this am, after said outing, and we decided we'd just ensure that my nephew knew he had people who cared about him. The 2 men had a great time, Scott said.
I feel wrung out. The Banyan is good. A young woman from there has been chosen as nanny to a famous Mumbai actress's child, and has left for the big city. She is extremely attractive and, after her husband sent her home 3 months after they got married (the marriage was essentially over), she felt that she was burdening her parents and got on a train and came to Chennai. She stated that she was raped by policemen en route. She had a couple of medical problems, which I treated, and stated to her that she could call us any time she needed for medical or other help. As much as folks envied her for being Star Actress's nanny, my priority was to ensure her safety and continued health. I noticed that the founders have a written plan of action for this young woman's resettling, and was impressed.
The boys and I spent last weekend in Madurai w/ my parents, today being my father's b'day, and my sister, Anu, and her younger son were there as well. (Scott could not get tix on the only train to Mdu from B'lore.) The entire time was spent eating and laughing - Anu stated that my parents' house was the only place where she could gain 2 lbs in 1 day. There is a big plastic surgery meeting in Mdu today and some apparent bigwigs were at my parents' house last night - they spoke solely of their own achievements and bored all of us to near tears. I can see no reason for this course of action (self-aggrandizement) and can only speculate that as folks age, they want to hold onto past glory. Anu states it has nothing to do w/ age, and I must agree: there are pompous folks of all ages.
The tutoring concluded last week as the school year is ending. The last day was 1 April and we stated to all, teachers and students, that we'd have a practice exam for them. Most received this news w/ trepidation until the April Fool's trick was revealed to them. We passed out paint boxes, pencils and candy, all of which many of you donated, and the kids were pleased w/ these goodies. We got some feedback from the kids about what they'd want emphasised in tutoring next year, and will implement these suggestions.
I am going to wind up. We leave for the U.S. next week and I look forward to seeing many of you again. Also, the chance to brush up on Western medicine is priceless. I visited a friend's mother, herself a wonderful friend, in Mdu and told her that tho' I am faithless, I think there is a God when I look at my husband and my American degree.
"Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre but they are more deadly in the long run." - Mark Twain
Until next week,
posted by Renu Weiss at
6:30 PM
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